Day of Love

Apparently I'm a little slow on posting about Valentine's Day. Oh well. Clay and I never really talked about doing anything, so when Saturday (the 12th) came around, we did our usual grocery shopping. He kept asking what time I was going to put Kort down to sleep that night and said I should have him be asleep by 6 just so we could have some time to relax together. When the time came, he told me that our friends from the ward were coming over to watch Kort so we could go to dinner! What a sweetheart :) I figured I wouldn't be too stressed because they wouldn't have to do much, just make sure he's sleeping, so I went with it. Anyway, it was such a great time to get out together and just relax over dinner at one of our favorite places, BJ's! I love their homemade rootbeer and pizookies! 

It was a great surprise! 

Also, over the past couple weeks Clay was saying he wanted pictures of me and Kort to put on his desk at work. I tried to get some with Kort, but I never looked decent enough, so I just did my own "session" with him and tweaked it a little.  Monday came, and when Clay got home from work, I had set all my stuff out for him on the table and had dinner ready with sparkling cider! I had a flower pot filled with candy and chocolate and little hearts on popsicle sticks written of things I love about him (my "pot of love"), blown up lips, and a framed picture of Kort. He knocked on the back door meaning his hands were full, so I opened the door only to find him with his hands full of a bouquet of flowers and chocolate! I should have taken a picture but no :( We enjoyed the evening with dinner and putting Kort to sleep and then watching a movie. It was a great day.

Sweet Things

 (I almost talked myself into getting that Cookies 'n' Cream one in the back.)

I think my life may have returned.  I find myself actually having time to clean the house, organize things, and hopefully continue with some unfinished projects.  Today, some great friends of mine invited me to go get cupcakes :) I'll admit that I've had plenty of cupcakes these last few days due to Clay taking sweets to work.  Luckily I am back to my pre-pregnancy weight, but this obviously isn't helping me lose that extra "15 pounds" that I've been wanting to lose.  Oh well.  It was so nice getting out of the house, even if Kort wasn't sleeping, maybe a little fussy, but full of smiles! With cutting back on our cable, TLC is one of the few channels we have left and I have found myself obsessing with Cake Boss.  It makes me drool over pastries, which is a bad no-no. It was great getting a cupcake today to fill those cravings :)

It's Official . . .

Ok, sorry for that last downer.  I was feeling that way at the moment, but I think that just getting it out and expressing my feelings made me feel a lot more comfortable and confident in our living situation.  Things are good and I have been extremely blessed in this move.

Onward...yes, I am officially a Washington resident now.  My Idaho driver's license was expiring, and uh, I think I've actually been illegally driving in WA now since we moved because I believe you have a month or so after you move to get a driver's license. Oops.  I find it dumb that I had to get a WA one because a) it's twice the amount of Idaho's and b) we're just going to be moving this summer anyway and will probably have to get the other state's license if they're as strict as here. Lame-O. Oh well. The nice thing about having a Washington driver's license, however, is that you can pay only an additional 15 big ones to have a "passport" to cross into Canada! When my parents come into town for Kort's baby blessing they wanted to take a ferry into Victoria so I figured this was the perfect time to do it.  I'd also like to take a trip to Vancouver too before we move so hopefully this will make us actually follow through with it :) Anyway, I'm sad to see my Idaho driver's license go. I will always be an Idahoan . . .

free-write

I should warn you first off, that this is probably going to be a downer post.  I realize I shouldn't blog when I'm so emotional and so anyway, this is what you get - this is me.  There's been a lot of talk on families lately - church, other people's blogs, etc.  Really, I don't know how I've adapted to this move to Washington for the last 1.5 years without being close to family.  We've been very blessed to have family come and visit, luckily though.  But it's like sometimes I just want to leave the house and go run over to my sister's for the day, or just hang out with the family at night.  All these emotions running through my head are probably the cause of having a baby - it would be nice to have family around.  Don't get me wrong, I have made great friends here, but there's just something about siblings, parents, ya know, to just comfort you and make things better.  This is where I have greatly depended on Clay to fill those needs.  I have grown such a deeper love and appreciation for him that I can't even begin to wonder what I would do without him.  It's something that I hate to even think about.  But this is where family begins.  I have my own family here.  We depend on each other to get through the rough patches.  I know things will get better.  Ok, I'm just rambling on and have no idea what I'm even talking about anymore.  I suppose this is like one of those free-writing posts that I remember doing in English class in Jr. High.  I guess I'm just trying to adapt to change - something that I don't think I like that much :) It took a while to adapt to this move, to gain friends, to feel like a part of something, to feel welcomed at church.  I know that another move somewhere is right around the corner.  I hate the unexpected.  We don't know where to yet. I am a planner.  I feel like I have to have things set in stone.  I love my pocket calendar to write things in.  Anyway, one thing I know for sure is that I have a loving Heavenly Father that knows me.  Yes, He knows what's best for me, what I can and can't handle.  And that's what gives me comfort.  I know that I am taken care of.  That I will adapt to change and can handle what's thrown at me.  He has placed Clay in my life to help me out, to handle those situations.  I am eternally grateful for this knowledge.  I can't express how thankful I am for Clay, especially during this new "change".  Kort is such a blessing to us.  Yes, there are the ups and downs, but slowly I am progressing and beginning to feel this new unconditional love towards him.  It has brought Clay and I closer together.  It has made me want to do better and try a little bit harder.  Ok, I'm done rambling now.  I just can't wait to see our families again! March can't come quick enough for Kort's baby blessing :D

The Best Man

I'm a little late on this, but I just had to recognize Clay's Birthday! It was Sunday, January 16th.  I felt so bad not being able to throw him a big party or anything, obviously because of my lack of sanity/baby blues, but I was able to suck it up and invite some friends over for a quick cake and ice cream night that evening.  He's always been talking about wanting to get a Tres Leches cake, so we went out and bought it Saturday night and indulged in it the next day.  Yum! It was quite delicious! 

I can't express my gratitude enough for this guy.  He is the best to me, my perfect husband, my one and everything.  He stays up late to help out with Kort so I can go to sleep early, he holds me when I cry, he motivates me and encourages me when I am down on myself.  He is the hardest worker I know and never gives up on anything.  I don't know how I ever got so lucky to marry him.  He makes me want to be a better person, to strive to achieve my goals, help me become more Christlike, and for us to work together to have the spirit in our home more.  He is perfect for me! 

I Love You Clay!

D-Day

I figure it's probably about time I update my blog with how the delivery went.  These last couple weeks I'm surprised I've gotten through.  I don't know how I am even finding the time to update this as it seems as Kort is becoming colicky or whatever.  Luckily, a good friend of mine is letting me borrow her Moby Wrap and this is the first time I could figure out the thing so Kort is just bundled up next to me, making sure he's not crying. Miracle.  

Anyway, here's the details.

Last Doc appointment was Thursday, December 30, 2010.  I was 2 cm dilated, 80% effaced.  My Doc and I had talked about being induced, yes, because of the tax credit, but also because of our insurance.  Obviously everyone was wanting to get induced that weekend too.  She said I was a good candidate though and she'd try to get me scheduled for Friday, the 31st.  I got a call from her that Thursday night saying that I was scheduled to go in at 7:00 a.m., New Year's Eve!  Everything was becoming so surreal! It was like sleeping on Christmas Eve! We checked in at the hospital, got to my room, and just chilled for a while.  It took them 3 times to get my IV in and then around 9:00 they gave me Cytotek, a lesser form of Pitocin.  It did speed up my contractions and come noon, they kept me on it because my contractions were being regular.  By about 2:30, they started me on Pitocin.  The Doc came in and broke my water around 4:00.  Oh wow. Do I really know what they mean now by a gush of warm water! ha ha So the contractions were starting to get pretty rough so they gave me some Fentanyl (I think the name is appropriate for me because it sounds just like our last name :) to help with the pain before I got my epidural.  Well, that didn't last long because I was starting to die, so I quickly asked for the epidural.  By that time, I was already dilated to a 9.5 cm.  I could have gone natural within the next hour, but HECK no, it was killing me! But oh Heaven, I was in love with the epidural! It started working around 6 or so and I was starting to push by 7:00 p.m.  Kort was delivered at 8:41 p.m.  Oh what a joy it was to have Kort placed on my chest!  I knew I would cry, but not like I did.  I can't believe this thing growing inside of me was now physically in front of me!  Clay was such a good sport about everything.  He cut the umbilical cord and was so comforting for me.  Now, I don't want to get all graphic for you, but I thought it was the funniest thing/feeling when I delivered the placenta-what a gush!. Ha ha Unfortunately, I did tear and had to get stitches, but after recovering for a little, we headed upstairs to our room to stay.  It was the weirdest feeling having an infant in our room, that we were supposed to take care of now.  Yes, it's still weird to this day, but it's a wonderful feeling!  Well, that just about does it.  Hopefully  I'll keep you all updated now for how things happen.  Geez, I just can't believe it's been 2.5 weeks already!

 First family picture! He came out pretty bruised face, 

if you can't tell :)

 Play time!

 Kort's first bath! He's starting to like them more, thank goodness!

Taking one of his big yawns! Too bad it doesn't put him 

right to sleep.

Brad Paisley says it best

I'm beginning to understand the meaning of postpartum depression...well I should say, the baby blues.  I suppose it happens to every new mother, and now I am part of those statistics.  Clay went back to work yesterday, but thank goodness his mom has been here to help out.  I'm fine throughout the day, emotional wise, but when he gets home, it's like he's all I can look at or think of.  I feel like a clingy girlfriend who won't let go or go away :) ha ha This song came back to me and I couldn't express or describe my feelings any better.  It really is like I'm falling in love all over again having Kort and starting a family.  I suppose posting this video is just helping me get through this, so I hope you at least enjoy listening to the song :) I'm doing good, but this song is just comforting to me. Enjoy!