2 Months

(This is his Mickey from his Aunt JoJi:)

This little dude is two months! Two doesn't seem like a lot, but when you compare it to one month, holy cow, he's really grown up! 

One of my last posts, about my venting, obviously it's the hormones talking. That first month was really hard emotionally, but once your body does get back into the swing of things and you start getting a little bit more sleep, life does become a lot better. It's so hard getting past those weeks though. Ugh, I did hate it, but once right around six weeks hit, life started becoming manageable. 

At about six weeks, I had a routine down. Griffin would take a few good couple hour naps and then his evening cat naps. Well, that sure changed. It was frustrating me. But one of my good friends who also had her baby a few days before me said something that has totally helped me. She said that she stopped trying to adjust to all the changes. THANK YOU! :) As simple as that may sound, that has helped my sanity. Forget trying to make sure he's getting the right length of naps, certain time of day, whatever. However, I do try to coincide Griffin's and Kort's naps together and so far it's gone pretty well so I do get a little bit of "me" time - you know, to shower in the middle of the afternoon, or take a short nap, or simply just have some peace and quiet!

I used to wake Griffin up at the same time each day, but I've given up on that. He usually wakes up between 8 and 9. He'll stay awake for about 1.5 hours between naps. He's been giving me at least one good nap, usually in the morning. It was during Kort's nap which was awesome, but not so much anymore. If he does wake up cranky and Kort is still asleep, I'll rock him back to sleep and fall asleep myself. I'll put him back in his bed when I hear Kort wake up, and then sometimes Griffin will sleep for another hour, maybe. After his afternoon nap, he'll take a couple of 30-45 minute cat naps starting around dinner time. I've tried to keep him awake starting around 7:30 so I can start getting him ready for bed around 9:00. I have been having the hardest time getting him to fall asleep on his own at bedtime. I can put him down drowsy for nap time and he'll fall asleep on his own, but for some reason it's just not working at nighttime. I've been trying the sleep training I did for Kort with putting him down drowsy, staying by his side and just patting and shushing him to comfort him. It doesn't help. Once I pick him up after about ten minutes, he calms right down. Sometimes he'll start falling asleep. Obviously he was ok. So I put him back down and he start right back up crying and my comfort techniques don't help. We usually end up just holding him until he is asleep for a while. I'll keep working on this, but it gets so frustrating sometimes and Clay knows it does, so he'll just take him and put him to sleep so I can fall asleep in the bed on my own without baby sounds. Anyway, that's how his sleep is going. I'm so thankful though that he's falling asleep on his own at least for his naps. 

Griffin is doing great at nursing. He eats about every three hours and only wakes up once during the night, which he started doing a little after a month old. When I went for a weight check around three weeks, the doctor said he was doing great and I didn't have to wake him up at night to feed him - he would just wake up when he was hungry. I was always so confused and what to do about that. Some would say to make sure to wake them up every few hours to feed, which does make sense when they're newborns, but I didn't know how long to do that for. So this is for my own record - when I don't have to wake them up to feed them in the night :) With Kort, I remember setting alarms on my phone of when I needed to go feed him in the night. Yeah, that got pretty annoying fast. You definitely learn from your first one and so from that, it does make things easier with the second child.

Smiles are becoming a daily thing during awake time :) He loves my stupid faces and noises while he's sitting in the bouncer. His neck isn't quite strong to keep his head straight so he leans to the side since there's no neck pillow thingy, but he's getting great at holding his head up overall. Kort loves poking him in the eye and trying to bite his feet and roll him over. He's getting better with handling him though. Also, with Kort, he's beginning to really sit still to watch a show, or at least his Colors, Shapes, and Numbers DVD! I'm pretty sure he's learning from it, but I try not to let him watch it 24/7 and still play outside, etc., but it's been such a nice distraction for him so that I'm able to hurry and take a shower or like I'm on here posting :) ha ha It's been so nice though.

 I'm beginning to understand when people say it just makes their day when they get their smiley baby from the crib in the morning. Lately Griffin has been waking up happy in the morning or from a nap and when I go get him he begins to smile! I really do love it! I'm getting to the point where my hormones are getting back to normal and I can really begin to feel the love I have for this baby! Anyway, more to come when he has his 2 month appointment next week.

New Nephew!

Tyce Benjamin Lungren

May 8, 2013

7:39 a.m.

8 lbs. 11 oz. ~ 21.5 inches long

Janelle has had her other two kids two weeks early. Well, that time had passed for this boy and she hadn't progressed much at her doctor's appointment. But little did they know he was ready to come :)

Her water broke at 2:00 a.m., got her epidural and pitocin to speed the contractions back up. 7:15 the nurse came to check her and she was READY! The doc got there, gave two pushes and pulled him out! Super fast! So excited for another cousin for Kort and one as the same age as Griffin!

Love you guys!

Griffin's Blessing Day

He was exactly one month old for his blessing.

We were so lucky to have the family that we did here for Griffin's blessing. We had tried to find a time where the most family could come and so this is what we got :) Quinn and Kaitlyn were able to come between semesters at school, Carol (cita) had just been here a week and a half earlier but I found them all great prices on flights so they couldn't pass it up ;) and Barb was so great to at least have Brandon come and stand in the circle and be here. As always, she sent great presents for Kort and Griffin to spoil her nephews :)

We sure did miss my family though. My sister and I seem to time things wrong because with Kort, she had actually gone into labor when my parents came for his blessing so obviously her family couldn't come. For Griffin's, she was too far along with baby #3 to come also and my parents had already had prior obligations that weekend. They are coming the beginning of June to visit though!

Just like the norm, the Oklahoma wind definitely did not help with making us look like supermodels. Not a flattering picture ;)

I can't believe Clay and I are the parents of two boys now! I suppose we really do have to start growing up more and being better parents. Definitely a change in the house.

The baby blessing was just beautiful though. There were two other babies being blessed before Griffin so Clay was helping keeping Kort quiet. Once Clay took Griffin, Kort was all over the place. I really did feel the spirit through the words which were spoken, but it was hard to really listen. Gratefully, there was a lady in the ward that had been taking notes of all the blessings and had come over to me to give me what she had heard. That piece of paper will go in the baby book. :)

Overall, it was a great weekend. We took everyone to Clay's work to check out the wind turbines and really just relaxed most of the time. Clay put his new hammock up and had everyone help plant his topsy turvys full of tomatoes :)

6 weeks

It's already been six weeks since I've delivered this baby! I'll be honest, I want time to fly because I want Griffin to get on a better sleeping schedule (and to let me sleep!) and to be bigger so Kort doesn't smother him! I haven't really been the type to want to really snuggle babies, maybe because I've always been hormonal crazy and right now it's hard because I need to take care of Kort as well. So sue me if I say I partially want time to fly. 

Anyway, I do love this chunk of love. He seems like he's totally different than Kort. I do find myself calling him Kort though for several things. It's like I am having to re-do everything with Kort, except I'm obviously not and this is another human being that we've been trusted with to raise. 

At 5 weeks:

Height: 22 inches = 61%

Weight: 11 lbs. 5 oz. = 82%

Head Circumference: 38.1 cm = 43%

I believe it was like the third or fourth week that he started having really bad projectile spit up. It was just nasty. One time it actually got on my face. Nasty. Anyway, so I thought he had been losing weight because of it. Took him in for a weight check and he had actually almost gained a pound that week which generally they like around 6 oz. a week. Um, no problem there then. He wasn't fussy or anything but I guess he had been gassy. We got gas drops and decided that I should go off dairy and chocolate to see if it would make a difference. I guess it did because to this day he really hasn't had it happen again. I did splurge the weekend family was here with chocolate milk and oreos and sure enough, he had bad p. spit up the next day. So I am still off it but do drink Almond milk which really isn't bad. I do miss my chocolate though so hopefully his digestive system will continue getting stronger and I can go back slowly to eating my dairy and chocolate in moderation. It's been harder to lose this baby weight, as I've heard it is after the first child, so hopefully this will help as well. I am just about back to my pre baby weight or at least close to it to losing about 30 pounds in 6 weeks? Heck, I'll take it :) 

This is pretty much his schedule for now. It is in the process of changing, which hopefully it really won't change like it is.

8:00 a.m. wake up and eat

9:30 down for nap

11:45ish awake and eat

1:15ish down for nap (same as Kort so MY nap time, too!!)

4:00ish awake and eat

5:30ish down for nap

-this is where it drives me crazy because I wish he would just take another normal two hour nap.

6:00 wake up

and the rest is so random with falling asleep whenever but he usually is asleep by 10 p.m. in either mine or Clay's arms.

1:30 a.m. feeding

5:00 a.m. feeding

That's probably as close as it gets to being constant. He's been starting to take 45 minute naps in the morning and I can't get him back to sleep in his crib unless I hold him, which frustrates me because Kort is so hyper at that time and wants attention. Evenings are so messed up. He's fallen asleep at night in his crib once and taken a two hour evening nap like I'd hope just once. I'm sure things will start to get more structured though. 

Kort is loving to say "eye" all the time and touch everyone's eye, including Griffin's which obviously he's not so gentle. We have to let him hold him every so often so he doesn't get so rough with him.

Hopefully this will help me in the future knowing schedules and progression :)

Baby Shower

My friends Lorna and Amber were incredibly kind to throw me a baby shower the week before I had Griffin. I was not expecting to have one at all because it was my second child and another boy. So they called it a diaper shower and most everyone that came gifted me with diapers and wipes. I cannot say how grateful I was to have received all of it. I just wanted to document this to remember that I have had great friends here in Enid, especially during those times when I say I hate this town or I don't have friends :) Lorna made the diaper tractor in the middle and Amber made some delicious food as well. It was a great time!

The Baby Blues Venting

I was totally meaning to write this post just after Griffin was born - in my super emotional stage - but maybe it's best that I didn't and am forgetting all the "horrible" feelings I had.

I felt great the instant I delivered Griffin. Things went smooth and I felt like a champ, other than my numb legs :) I did make sure that Clay stayed the night with me while Carol was at home with Kort. Other than that, I didn't feel a whole lot of postpartum emotional stuff. Once the weekend was over and Clay had to go back to work, things really hit home. 

That whole first week I was trying to get nursing down. Griffin would get so worked up when he couldn't latch on, even if I tried before he was really hungry. I was beginning to think I wouldn't be able to nurse him. I was torn. I knew I wanted to nurse because obviously it's free and healthier for him and helps me out physically as well. But on the other hand, if it was going to continue with him getting worked up trying to latch on every time to nurse, I might as well continue bottle feeding him - which we were giving him formula at the time since none of my milk had even come in either. I didn't want to bottle feed and pump because frankly I couldn't pump, take care of Kort and Griffin and then feed and also I had a crappy pump that wouldn't do all that fast enough. I was so tempted to give up and just formula feed him. 

Clay went out of town Tuesday until Wednesday night. That was a killer. I was so thankful that Carol was there to help out, but it just didn't cut it - I needed Clay to help me get through this. But once again, there's only 24 hours in a day and time did not stand still - thank goodness! That Wednesday, I was pretty much ready to give up trying to nurse. I had been trying to use the nipple shield as well and reading up on my nursing book also making sure I was doing as much as I could to get it to work. Well, Griffin decided to nurse with the shield once that day and from then on, things continued to get better. Dangit - guess I really did have to end up nursing ;) ha ha So the rest of that week I kept working on getting Griffin to nurse and latch on correctly. 

The next week was spent trying to adapt to life with two kids. Carol had one more week here so I still took advantage of her helping out with Kort. She would keep him entertained while I put Griffin to sleep and caught up on mine as well. I eventually would try to do every day tasks on my own while she stood aside, just so I could somewhat get a routine back on track. I definitely needed her there that week. It was super hard to see her leave. She was flying out of Wichita Sunday afternoon and she was so kind to let us drop her off even a little earlier at the airport so I could go with them and get home earlier at a decent time. There was no way I was ready to be on my own that afternoon/night if I didn't have to. Luckily Griffin fed and was awake then napped the whole way there and back. Phew! 

My first week alone I don't even know how I survived. The Relief Society brought a few meals that week and I had made freezer meals previously so we were set there. Griffin wasn't napping in his crib or frankly anywhere but someone's arms so most of his naps I would have to hold him while he napped. This made my days absolutely crazy having to deal with Kort as well. I couldn't give him attention or play with him and had to constantly make sure things were out of his reach so he wouldn't make a mess or get into things. Clay would come home every night and do the dishes, clean the house, do the laundry . . . he was my super hero. I was kind of the same way I was when I had Kort, with the clinginess and attachment to Clay as soon as he came home, but not to the point where I would follow him around attached to his side. As soon as he walked through that door, it was an instant sigh of relief knowing that everything would be better the rest of the night.

6 weeks later and I'm still getting over this anxiety and tenseness and hasn't been quite the I'm-in-absolute-love stage with this newborn baby. I do feel anxiety when I have to take care of Griffin and Clay is playing with Kort because Kort is still my baby and I miss him when he's not around. That's how I would feel when I had to take Griffin to his appointments. It felt so weird not having him in the car, even if he was whining or throwing his food on the floor. I missed that kid. I feel bad that I can't give him all the attention that he needs right now. I'm doing better with that however during Griffin's naps. Kort does seem to be acting out a little more or just in his terrible twos so he's been going into time out more often. Soon though hopefully I will be back to my normal self and we'll be in a good routine.

I can see why people have more than one child. You do tend to forget all the yucky and bad things about pregnancy/delivery. However, I absolutely hated the first and part of the second trimester being nauseous 24/7 and tired all the time. I know I did, but right now it doesn't seem like it was that bad. Delivery - really it wasn't all the bad, but the contractions without the epidural . . . AHHH! It was the worst. But obviously I've forgotten about it. Recovery has definitely been better than it was with Kort. I remember sitting on ice packs for a couple weeks and it hurt to sit on my butt. With Griffin, I only tore a little, seeing how he was smaller than Kort, and the bleeding ended at about three weeks after and I was cleared by my doctor at four weeks for everything. Those first few weeks with a newborn and crazy hormones and lack of sleep - I seriously HATED parts of my life. I am done having kids. I'm still in that mind frame. But those weeks were horrible for me. I threw fits (not as bad as I did when I had Kort) and wanted to throw and break things. Heck, I still feel that way sometimes. I can see how people get frustrated and end up hurting their baby. I have to try really hard to be patient and when I do lose my temper, I have to set Griffin down and leave the room. I will just go to Kort and bawl and hug him really tight. I hate the unexpected. I hate change. You'd think with so many moves we've had that I'd be a pro with change, but having a baby is the biggest change and stressor. I was so content with how things were going with Kort and our daily routine. If he was cranky, we'd get out of the house. We could leave anytime. Clay and I could just take him and go to dinner or whatever we wanted. Now everything is centered around Griffin. I'm not saying I regret having another child or anything - definitely not, but that's what I hate about change and I'm super uncomfortable with it. I'm also super socially awkward right now. I feel weird when I talk to people or around them, yet I have to be or I'm going to go crazy. Anyway, this has definitely been my venting writing post-baby. Maybe it will help me in times of need if we ever do have another baby in the future. I kept looking back at what I wrote about Kort and thought I wrote a lot but nope and I wish I had so here's to lots of detailed posts that one day will go in a book :)

A Baby Story

Wednesday, March 13th was my due date. My last ob appointment the week before the doc really thought I was going to have this baby. I was dilated to a 4 and about 50% effaced. I hadn't noticed any real painful contractions so I had no idea if or when I would go into labor. She said if I ended up showing to my 40 week appointment, she'd just induce me the next day! Well, the due date came. I was almost dilated to a 5 and 70% effaced. Clay's mom had already come into town to help out so we figured we just needed to get this baby out.

We showed up to the hospital Thursday morning, March 14th, at 8:00 a.m. Got hooked up to the pitocin and antibiotics (I had the GBS bacteria) by 9:30. Oh.my.gosh. Once the contractions started happening, I was miserable! I don't know why I didn't press the nurse button sooner, but finally she came in and saw that I was in pain and said the anesthesiologist was on her way. THANK YOU! Well, it took about another 20 minutes for her to get there. I was in major pain. There was no way I was doing this natural though - I have nothing to prove! FINALLY we got the epidural in and working and boy was that ever heaven! It never felt so good to not feel my legs. Ha ha. By that time, it was about noon and my doc was going to come in then and break my water. Well, all she did was put some pressure up there and it broke instantly. I was ready to push.

Basically, no later than 15 minutes was this baby out! I pushed through four contractions and didn't break a sweat. Just joking. It felt so easy though.

Griffin D Fenton

03.14.13

12:23 p.m.

8 lbs. 4 oz.

21.5 inches

I am lucky enough to have gotten this much written down to post, so more will have to come later.